Author: karyasarma

Berapakah Harga Bola?

Sebuah raket tenis dan sebuah bola harganya Rp32.000. Harga raket Rp30.000 lebih mahal daripada harga bola. Berapakah harga bola?

Jawaban

Rp1.000

Penjelasan:

Jika harga bola Rp2.000, maka harga raket tenis Rp30.000, yang artinya harga raket tenis hanya lebih mahal Rp28.000 daripada harga bola. Sedangkan jika harga bola Rp1.000, maka harga raket tenis Rp31.000, yang artinya harga raket tenis lebih mahal Rp30.000 daripada harga bola.

Penjelasan Dengan Model Matematika:

Misal:
x = harga bola
y = harga raket tenis

x + y = Rp32.000 (i)

Karena harga raket tenis lebih mahal Rp30.000 daripada harga bola, maka:

y = x + Rp30.000 (ii)

Substitusikan persamaan (ii) ke persamaan (i):

x + (x + Rp30.000) = Rp32.000
2x + Rp30.000 = Rp32.000
2x = Rp32.000-Rp30.000
2x = Rp2.000
x = Rp1.000 (iii)

Substitusikan persamaan (iii) ke persamaan (ii):

y = x + Rp30.000
y = Rp1.000 + Rp30.000
y = Rp31.000

Q.E.D.

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Maju Kena Mundur Kena

Pada suatu hari, seorang kapten kapal yang sangat menyukai matematika berlayar dari Belawan menuju Tanjung Priok. Dalam perjalanan, sebuah kapal bajak laut menghadang kapal sang kapten tersebut dan akhirnya berhasil menguasai kapal dan menyandera sang kapten kapal. Sang kapten bajak laut sangat senang karena berhasil menyandera kapten kapal yang terkenal akan kejeniusannya itu. Merasa dirinya lebih hebat, sang kapten bajak laut mencoba menguji kepintaran sang kapten kapal.

Sang kapten bajak laut kemudian memberi satu perintah kepada sang kapten kapal yang berbunyi, “Buatlah suatu pernyataan, dimana jika nilai dari pernyataanmu bernilai benar, maka kapal mu akan ditenggelamkan beserta seluruh awaknya, tetapi jika nilai dari pernyataanmu tersebut bernilai salah, maka kapal dan seluruh awak mu akan dibakar sampai habis.”

Jika Anda adalah sang kapten kapal tersebut, pernyataan apa yang akan Anda berikan kepada sang kapten bajak laut?

Jawaban

“Kapal dan seluruh awak ku akan dibakar sampai habis.”

Penjelasan:

Jika kapten bajak laut menganggap pernyataan di atas benar, maka kapten bajak laut harus menenggelamkan kapal beserta seluruh awaknya, yang artinya pernyataan sang kapten kapal salah. Dan jika kapten bajak laut menganggap pernyataan diatas salah, maka kapten bajak laut harus membakar kapal beserta seluruh awaknya, yang artinya pernyataan sang kapten kapal benar. Dari sini sang kapten bajak laut sadar bahwa nilai (baik benar maupun salah) dari pernyataan sang kapten kapal berkontradiksi dengan apa yang akan dilakukannya.

Ending:

Sang kapten bajak laut menyadari kebodohannya dan membebaskan sang kapten kapal beserta kapal dan seluruh awaknya.

Alternate Ending:

Merasa dibodohi oleh kapten kapal, sang kapten bajak laut membakar kapten beserta kapal dan seluruh awaknya hingga kapal tersebut tenggelam. 😀

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Wrong Email Address

A couple going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip so he went to the destination first and his wife would meet him the next day.

When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email.

Unfortunately, when typing her address, he mistyped a letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher’s wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.

When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

Grey Hairs

A curious child asked his mother, “Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey?”

The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child, “It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey!”

The child replied innocently, “Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.”

Quote #1

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

Robert Anson Heinlein

Dear Tech Support

Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0. Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

Thanks,
A Troubled User
_______________________________

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in yourWife 1.0 manual under Warnings•Alimony – Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

I Know How To Make Someone Feel Guilty

A guy asked a girl in a library, “Do you mind if I sit beside you?”

The girl answered with a loud voice, “I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!!!”

All the students in the library started staring at the guy and he was embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quitely to the guy’s table and she told him, “I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking, I guess you felt embarrassed right?”

The guy responded with a loud voice, “$200 JUST FOR ONE NIGHT!!!? THAT’S TOO MUCH!!!”

… and all the people in the library looked at the girl in shock and the guy whispered in her ears, “I study Law and I know how to make someone feel guilty.”

Dua Orang Gay

Dua orang gay berdiri di sudut jalan ketika seorang perempuan berambut pirang dengan bentuk tubuh yang indah lewat dengan pakaian ketat dan tipis.

Kata seorang di antara mereka ke yang lain, “Pada kesempatan-kesempatan seperti ini, saya berkhayal menjadi seorang lesbi.”

Kertas Dinding

Sepasang suami-istri muda pindah ke sebuah apartemen yang baru dan memutuskan untuk mengganti kertas dinding ruang makan. Mereka memanggil tetangga yang mempunyai ruang makan dengan ukuran yang sama dan bertanya, “Berapa gulung kertas dinding yang Anda beli ketika Anda memasangnya di ruang makan?”

“Tujuh,” katanya.

Maka pasangan itu membeli tujuh gulung kertas mahal, dan mereka mulai memasang. Ketika mereka hampir menghabiskan gulungan yang keempat, ruang makan sudah selesai. Merasa terganggu, mereka kembali ke tetangga itu dan berkata, “Kami mengikuti nasihat Anda, tetapi ada kelebihan tiga gulung!”

“Jadi,” katanya, “itu juga terjadi padamu.”