Author: karyasarma
How to Plant Kiwi and Banana from Home
Siapa Yang Salah?
Sepasang suami istri sedang tidur dengan nyenyaknya. Tiba-tiba sang istri mengigau dengan suara keras, “Mas… Mas…! Bangun Mas…! Bangun Mas…! Suamiku pulang…!”
Sang suami pun kaget dan dengan refleks loncat keluar lewat jendela.
Pertanyaannya, “Siapa yang salah?”
Tamu
Ada tamu datang, membersihkan rumah dan secara canggih dan tegas mengusir tikus-tikus. Kami sekeluarga terpesona.
Kami menerimanya sebagai keluarga, karena tamu itu lebih menguasai pengelolaan rumah dibanding kami sekeluarga.
Akhirnya rumah kami menjadi rumahnya, dan kami numpang berkat kebaikan hatinya.
A Corporate Story
Every day, a small Ant arrives at work very early and starts work immediately.
She produces a lot and she was happy. The Chief, a
Tiger, was surprised to see that the
Ant was working without supervision.
He thought if the
Ant can produce so much without supervision, wouldn’t
she produce even more if
she had a supervisor!
So he recruited a
Bee who had extensive experience as
supervisor and who was famous for
writing excellent reports. The
Bee’s first decision was to set up a
clocking in attendance system.
He also needed a secretary to help him write and type his reports and he recruited a
Rabbit, who managed the archives and monitored all
phone calls.
The Tiger was delighted with the
Bee’s reports and asked him to produce
graphs to describe production rates and to analyse
trends, so that he could use them for
presentations at Board‘s meetings.
So the Bee had to buy a new
computer and a laser printer and recruited a
Cat to manage the
IT Department. The
Ant, who had once been so productive and relaxed, hated this new plethora of paperwork and meetings which used up most of her time…!
The Tiger came to the conclusion that it was high time to nominate a person in charge of the department where the
Ant worked. The position was given to the
Monkey, whose first decision was to buy an Air Conditioner and an ergonomic
chair for his office. The new person in charge, the
Monkey, also needed a
computer and a personal assistant, who he brought from his previous department, to help him prepare a
work and
Budget Control Strategic Optimization Plan.
The Department where the Ant works is now a sad place, where nobody laughs anymore and everybody has become upset.
It was at that time that the Bee convinced the boss, the
Tiger; of the absolute necessity to start a climatic study of the environment. Having reviewed the charges for running the
Ant’s department, the
Tiger found out that the Production was much less than before. So he recruited the
Owl, a prestigious and renowned consultant to carry out an audit and suggest solutions.
The Owl spent three months in the department and came up with an enormous report, in several volumes, that concluded.
.
.
.
“The Department is overstaffed…”
.
.
.
Guess who the Tiger fires first?
.
.
.
Of course, the Ant…,
.
.
.
… because she showed lack of motivation and had a negative attitude.
Note:
The Character in this fable are fictitious; any resemblance to real people or facts within your Corporation is pure coincidence only.
Membagi Tanah Warisan
Heisenberg memiliki sebidang tanah dengan bentuk yang dapat dilihat pada gambar di atas. Heinsenberg memiliki 4 orang anak. Sebelum meninggal Heisenberg berpesan kepada anak-anak-nya untuk membagi tanah tersebut menjadi 4 bagian yang memiliki luas dan bentuk yang sama agar tidak ada rasa saling cemburu di antara mereka. Bagaimana caranya agar ke 4 anak itu dapat melakukan kehendak Heisenberg?
Note: Abaikan warna yang terdapat pada gambar. Warna-warna yang berbeda tersebut cuma untuk menunjukkan bahwa tiap warna adalah sebuah bidang persegi yang artinya memiliki panjang sisi yang sama.
Four 1s Make 5?
Do there exist operations that can be performed to make this equation true?
1 1 1 1 = 5
Note: Any operations can be used, so get creative!
Warm Beer
A man in the pub orders a beer. He gets it and begins to drink it and notices the beer is kind of warm. So he mentions something to the bartender, who tells him to shut up and just drink his beer.
Then it is time to pay and instead of giving three $1 dollar bills to the bartender, the guy throws 30 dimes behind the counter.
The bartender is pissed and is on his hands and knees collecting change as the guy leaves.
The next day the man is back and he comes in waiving a $3 dollar bill.
The bartender thinks, “Okay, business is business,” and lets him in. Again, the beer is kind of warm, but the guy doesn’t say anything.
Comes time to pay, the man gives him the $5 note. The bartender goes to the register to get the change, but instead of taking out two $1 dollar bills, he takes out 20 dimes and throws them all around the entire pub. The bartender says, “There is your f*cking change!”
The man looks around and remains quite calm. He takes out 10 dimes, throws them behind the counter and says, “Gimme another beer!”
Wikipedia vs Facebook vs Google vs Internet
Wikipedia: I know everything.
Facebook: I know everybody.
Google: I have everything.
Internet: Without me you’re nothing.
Electricity: B*tch please.
Sometimes I Want To Call You
Boy: Baby, sometimes I want to call you in the midnight to tell how much I love you.
Girl: Why don’t you?
Boy: I hear a voice that stops me from calling you.
Girl: What voice?
Boy: “Your account balance is insufficient to make this call.”
* Conversation via online messenger.