Author: karyasarma

Quote #70 – Jack Sparrow’s Quotes

My spirit will live on.

Not all treasure is silver and gold mate.

You’ve stolen me and I’m here to take myself back.

If you choose to lock your heart away, you’ll lose it for certain.

Why fight when you can negotiate?

Wherever we want to go, we’ll go. That’s what a ship is, you know. It’s not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that’s what a ship needs but what a ship is… what the Black Pearl really is… is freedom.

This is the day you will always remember as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!

The seas may be rough, but I am the Captain! No matter how difficult I will always prevail.

The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?

I regret nothing, ever.

Jack Sparrow

Always Be Nice

My little brother just asked, “Why are people so nice to the people who are about to die?”

And I told him that we want to make their last few moments on earth happy.

Then he told me, “Everyone dies a little everyday and sometimes we don’t know when a person is going to die, so why isn’t everyone always nice, because we never know what’s going to happen to someone.”

See You Again #1

I don’t know you well enough, I just know you make your brothers to lend me the Spica stick so I can play it too and that’s make you look like a hero for me. I am sorry for not wearing a good clothes on your wedding, I am not very comfortable wearing suit and pantofel.

However, you’ll never read this and I’ll make it sure by using my basic English so you’ll be confuse when you read this (I hope your English is not good). I wrote this not for you to read but for myself, so I can remember you, so you can live in my memory. Please don’t haunt me but if you insist please don’t call me “Bang” like what you did sometimes when you are still alive, I am younger than you so just call me by my name.

Rest in Peace Tiurma Silviana Napitupulu.

The Three Vampires

One day, there were three vampires bragging their strength and power to each other. They showed off their skills one by one.

The first vampire said, “Look at my skill.”

He’s gone in a blink of an eye and came back. His mouth is covered with blood. He said, “Did you see that village over there? I have sucked dry all of the villagers’ blood.”

The second vampire was amazed but he didn’t want to lose. He’s gone on a split second and went back. His mouth was also covered in blood. He said, “Did you see the town over there? I have sucked the towns people blood down to the last drop.”

The last vampire also wanted to show off his skill. He ran quickly and went back in the speed of light. His entire face was covered in blood. The two vampire were amazed. The last vampire said, “Did you see the street lamp there?”

The two vampire nodded quickly, impatient to hear his explanation. The last vampire catching his breath and said, “Well f*ck, I didn’t see it.”

Breastfeeding in Public

You have no idea what women go through when breastfeeding in public. Just the other day I saw 4 guys beating up a woman for breastfeeding, so I jumped into help. She didn’t stand a chance against all of us.

Lie Detector Robot

A man buys a lie detector robot that slaps people who lie. He decides to test it at dinner.

Dad: Son, where were you today during school hours?
Son: At school. [The robot slaps the son.]

Son: Ok! I watched a DVD at my mates.
Dad: Which one?
Son: Kung Fu Panda. [The robot slaps the son again.]

Son: Ok! It was a porno.
Dad: WHAT? When I was your age I didn’t even know what porn was! [The robot slaps the Dad.]

Mom: Hahahahaha! After all he’s your son. [The robot slaps the mom.]